the tina show: post-it note theatre

More uke goodness

2011-05-15T09:03:00.000-05:00

I'm busy packing to move to L.A....

Guest artist corner, part 2

2011-04-29T20:07:00.001-05:00

By the 5yo (soon to be 6yo). I just love this so freakin' much.

The most condescending agent rejection letter in the history of the Universe

2011-04-29T19:24:00.004-05:00

Me:
To: Anna O________
________Associates

Hello Ms. O________,

I thought you may be interested in my picture book.

(blah blah blah)

I appreciate you taking the time to look at this. Any feedback would be welcome.

Thanks,
Tina Kugler

Reply: (one hour later)

From: Anna O____________

Tiny, thanks, but I wouldn't be the right agent for this.

I wish you the best in placing the manuscript elsewhere.

Sincerely,

Anna O_________

.......?
...TINY?
TINY?!!!

TINY?????!!!!

I love that they referenced Otto Dix

2010-03-12T23:06:00.003-06:00

No, I haven't forgotten about you, I've just been extremely busy-- lining the recycling bins of art directors, stuff like that.
Anyhoo, this one's for all the art nerds out there:

70 Million by Hold Your Horses ! from L'Ogre on Vimeo.

guest artist corner- the 4 year old

2009-11-08T08:53:00.003-06:00

The 4 year old churns out about 12 of these a day.
I am considering selling them- send me $3 and you get a drawing from the pile.

it's going to be a loooong halloween...

2009-10-14T12:14:00.000-05:00

a commentary

2009-10-14T11:48:00.005-05:00

Okay, before you read this, first read (or at least skim) this article from jezebel.com regarding Twilight author Stephenie Meyer being idealized into a soul-less stick-Barbie in a biographical comic book. Which raises the question, as a lady type does one also need to be attractive to be a successful writer/illustrator/whatever? Because I am convinced this is the reason why I am being ignored by every single children's publisher in, like, the universe.

Also, sorry for the lag in posts. I've been too busy eating cookie dough.

in which i annoy my agent

2009-09-11T21:54:00.001-05:00

click to enlarge.

mom on board, who is about to freaking lose it i swear to god

2009-07-15T08:51:00.000-05:00

something to consider when purchasing a mirror...

2009-07-15T08:33:00.001-05:00

ah, i love the smell of despair & desperation in the morning

2009-07-14T22:15:00.001-05:00

yes! i am the greatest living failed children's illustrator!

the new puppy

2009-05-08T16:10:00.002-05:00

so we have a new puppy...harry the dog is half white german shepherd (his mom was rescued while pregnant) and apparently half standard poodle, and at six months is the size of a small pony. the boys love him, quite possibly too much.

more rejection letters

2009-02-16T09:55:00.003-06:00

A follow-up to a previous post about rejection letters.
They just keep a-comin'!

while i'm away....

2009-01-21T21:54:00.002-06:00

sorry for the lack of updates. busy busy. we moved, blah blah blah.
in the meantime, please check this out:
http://www.petsinuniform.com/gallery_of_pets.php
i just laughed so hard i gave myself the hiccups.

guest artist corner

2008-11-26T18:15:00.001-06:00

i just had to share my six-year-old's artistic interpretation of, that's right, a farting contest. note dude with trophy on right.
happy thanksgiving, folks!

another hastily-drawn comic about my strange children

2008-11-18T14:45:00.003-06:00

click to enlarge...
yeah, i don't get it either.

happy halloween!

2008-11-01T12:11:00.001-05:00

perils of taking a 3-year-old out trick-or-treating...

yet another something to tide you over: classic bollywood

2008-10-22T16:37:00.003-05:00

my kids' current favorite song of all time:

okay, so, this song is actually on the Ghost World soundtrack, which we have on the ipod in the car...apparently it sounds close enough to the old Neal Hefti Batman theme to the children (who are obsessed with the '60s Adam West Batman) so it is known as The Batman Song and we have to listen to it on the way to school every morning. (the best part of the morning commute is the 3-year-old belting it out in mock Hindi.)

also, i still feel sorry for that poor girl shaking her head through the whole thing.

one from the vaults

2008-10-16T12:12:00.002-05:00

this is an old one...my old boss just sent this to me...from back when we had an impending layoff at disney. thanks, old boss.

fat wonderwoman returns

2008-10-07T10:58:00.002-05:00

another one for jamar's fat wonderwoman blog.
i could draw fat wonderwoman all day.
(yes i know comic-con ended months ago. i live in wisconsin, okay?)

the great house search

2008-10-07T10:05:00.004-05:00

so we are looking for a new house. actually, with the current credit freeze, we are looking for a kind soul to lease us their house for a year and then we will cheerfully buy it.
everything in our price range has ONE glaring thing wrong with it:
cute house, no yard.
cute house, haunted. tiny living room. also no yard.
huge yard, but the house may fall down. sigh.

update: we found one we want to buy! BUT! see below for giant crisis!

ALSO- is there anyone in the Manitowoc area with minor carpentry skillz that will accept payment in artwork and/or a deferred payment plan? we need help to finish a project, and can't list the house till it's done, but we can't pay to HAVE it done till we sell the house. anybody? please? help?

another something to tide you over: the nicholas brothers

2008-10-01T20:52:00.002-05:00

i know how you guys enjoy wasting time reading my blog, so here is something even more entertaining for the time being. if you only have time for the ten-second-highlight-version, skip to about 2:30 and hold on to your freakin' hats.

the six-year-old's comment was "that's a really bad idea, because you could get hurt" but then he and his brother proceeded to try to re-enact it while loudly singing the music.

also, seriously, look at how few cuts there are.

this old @#*&!! house

2008-09-23T10:15:00.002-05:00

we are fixing up our house to sell it. (hence the lagging on posts.)
this is what i'm dealing with.
ummm, maybe if somebody wanted to help us, i'd have more time to entertain you folks with comics.
just sayin'.

sputnik tina

2008-08-25T15:25:00.002-05:00

this one is for kim...and everyone who bought a poster. thanks!

why you should come to my show

2008-07-28T12:45:00.000-05:00

a wee hiatus

2008-07-19T19:20:00.002-05:00

Dear gentle reader, please excuse my brief absence as I prepare for my very first solo exhibition (and Sputnik Girl poster release par-tay) on Friday, August 15th from 6 to 9pm at Persimmons Art & Vintage Gallery (314 N. 8th St., Manitowoc, 920-684-3006). I will be posting updates on my other blog.

In the meantime, I will try to unearth the drawer in my file cabinet that holds all of my old crap & post something from there. Probably.

a crummy commercial

2008-06-27T19:11:00.003-05:00

We interrupt our regular programming to bring you this public service announcement. Do you like this poster? If so, please scurry over to my other blog and pre-order it.
It is for Manitowoc's upcoming Sputnikfest!

I AM MAD.

2008-06-17T10:15:00.003-05:00

sometimes, the shortsightedness and sheer stupidity of others drives me to, well, freak out. this, my friends, is one of those times. i LIKE living here. also, i like living where there are nice things to do.
okay, for those of you who are not manitowoc dwellers, here's the deal: yes, it does get hot here in the summer. yes, we have beaches (we are on lake michigan, which is a great lake), but ours are sadly, frequently closed because of pollution (usually e coli from 800 million seagulls crapping at once, or perhaps something about the 10 billion cigarette butts strewn all over) and, frankly, they aren't as nicely accessible as they should be.
anyway, the public city pool (circa 1969) closed several years ago because it was leaking. a lot. so, since we need a new city pool, why not make it DECENT? so a design was made with a zero-depth entry area for toddlers, and a water play area, and a lap area, and a water slide, and it was a WONDERFUL idea. and they raised a whole bunch of money for it, but they still needed funding from the city.
and now, after five years, the manitowoc city council has rejected it. no city pool. god forbid your property taxes go up two dollars to improve the quality of life. hmm, i wonder if they will fix up the beaches then? anyone? bueller?
so our family swimming options are:
1. overcrowded ymca indoor pool
2. slathered in seagull poo and sprinkled with cigarette butts and dead fish parts
3. drive down to sheboygan for nice beaches & waterpark
get in the car, kids!

surf's up!

2008-06-08T18:04:00.001-05:00

why yes, i do have dainty ankles, thank you.

in the meantime...

2008-05-29T12:26:00.003-05:00

sorry i haven't posted on this one for a bit. kids making me crazy.
in the meantime, enjoy this minute & 16 seconds of sonic goodness (yes, it's safe to play in the company of toddlers, they will dig it too).

tina versus a tiny creature

2008-05-12T09:32:00.003-05:00

true story! another multipanel extravaganza. i apologize (well, not really) for the bad drawings but i was holding a gigantic crying baby and arguing with a two-year-old while drawing it. i have a mental backlog of a bunch of other post-its but had to get this one out first.
also (unrelated) while i was checking email last night i heard this. which was pretty cool. see, i don't hate all wildlife.

the big question

2008-05-01T16:34:00.002-05:00

today, i asked myself this question.
and the verdict is still out. so my sweatshirt is in the laundry basket, just to be safe.

rejection letters!

2008-04-29T12:05:00.004-05:00

click to enlarge, if you dare!
and you know what, J-Ro? i don't even care anymore that Harry Potter was rejected by a dozen publishers. boo hoo. i need to buy diapers and toilet paper and the only marginally useful skill i have is drawing. and it's not even that much of a skill. o highlights, why will you not let me draw your hidden picture?

i wish i had time to take a shower

2008-04-20T15:36:00.001-05:00

but as long as everyone else is happy...
because, how many people care if i take a shower?
two: myself & husband (most likely)
how many people care if i update my blogs?
three*
(* high estimate)

the dog days of april through october

2008-04-20T14:54:00.003-05:00

our neighbors have dogs. 4 or 5, actually, very large dogs. i am sure deep down they are nice, really, but bored out of their minds.
the children, on the other hand, are now terrified of dogs, any dogs, to the point of hysterics and tears. the weather is nice now, so they want to play in the backyard, but the minute they get out there, the dogs start up, and it's all over...

illustration friday- "primitive"

2008-04-18T16:36:00.002-05:00

For Illustration Friday, "primitive." I have wondered whether our ancestors had the same mood swings, irrational cravings, etc when pregnant as we do today.
P.S. Note to friends before you freak out: I am NOT pregnant.

So what DOES the Easter Bunny look like?

2008-03-06T08:45:00.002-06:00

some questions are better left unanswered...

a couple from the vaults

2008-02-18T08:02:00.003-06:00

i was going through some old storyboards this weekend & found these xeroxes.

the first can be titled "tina vs. soy milk"

and in this one i appear to be a drunken homeless elf:
(possibly an abandoned christmas greeting?)

ding! ding!

tina in stereo

2008-02-14T09:00:00.004-06:00

now you can pretend to hang out with me!
note the fancy new "radio tina" box on your right- just press play & i will impose my musical interests upon you from afar. i found this on my pal rob's blog. they don't have everything available yet (no pixies? breeders? valaida snow? BUT they do have the theme from the munsters, so yay) and some are weird "live" versions (sorry) but it is pretty cool.
so listen to it while you visit me here & wade through my self-pity...it's just like you are trapped in my car, but without the fear of pain and death!
also, you can click on the little icon in the lower right corner of the box and it will open in a separate window, so you can STILL enjoy the crap i like while you are doing things other than reading my blog. lucky you.

in which i blame diablo cody for my own ineptitude

2008-02-11T12:50:00.001-06:00

a multi-panel extravaganza, done in photoshop.
sigh...
also submitted for illustration friday "choose" since i chose...poorly.
and d.i.y. bangs are, for most of us, a bad choice. or maybe just me.
anyway, if you see me and my 1/2 inch long bangs, please say hello.

more baby weight

2008-02-06T14:14:00.000-06:00

yes, this is a real dvd, and everyone on it is having a GREAT TIME.
i am having a better time now, eating ice cream in my pajamas.

is your baby demon spawn too?

2008-02-04T07:27:00.000-06:00

so i made a new infant onesie (in illustrator) for my cafepress shop:

it's funny 'cuz it's true.

"foreclosure" is the new "f" word

2008-01-30T10:22:00.001-06:00

the REAL ending to the "let's find a job game." is anybody out there?

that sucker was a bad idea anyway

2008-01-17T08:42:00.001-06:00

either that, or the stomach flu is back

2008-01-16T16:01:00.000-06:00

nope, it's happiness! seriously, that workshop was like a self-help retreat.

omg, lynda barry PART TWO!

2008-01-07T14:47:00.001-06:00

i met lynda barry!!! her writing workshop, writing the unthinkable, was AMAZING and so was lynda! yay! look, i am smiling so big that you can see every last one of my choppers! count 'em! plus she liked my post-it comics, or at least said she did, so hooray!
update:
and then, after i posted the above picture, my pal tim sent me this:

omg, lynda barry!!!!

2008-01-04T14:39:00.001-06:00

oh my stars and garters!!! i am going to the amazing lynda barry's writing workshop this weekend in chicago and i am both elated and terrified. (what if she yells at me?)
i am going with my pal barb who does fantastic comics as well.
my husband (my poor, poor husband, who will be watching the demon children) wants me to print out a bunch of my post-it comics to give to her but i am too scared.

oh yeah, happy new year

2008-01-04T13:40:00.001-06:00

so, i haven't posted for awhile...

for kim, who injured herself and lived to blog about it

2007-12-06T14:49:00.001-06:00

so i had breakfast with my pal kim this morning, and we were joking about our blogs and how most of everything that happens to us ends up posted in cyberspace for any number of random strangers (well, and friends too). anyway, at the time i hadn't read her post yesterday about her accident-prone day, so i thought i'd illustrate it for her now.
ps. i laughed out loud when i drew this, which is sort of embarrassing.
pps. yes, i know i didn't draw the reflection in the mirror. i am lazy.

a video

2007-12-05T14:45:00.000-06:00

public service announcement: okay, so carson made me watch this, and now i'm making you watch it, because it's really great and everyone should watch this. ken robinson addresses creativity in schools, and he is actually really funny too.

saint nick comes tonight, whoever he is

2007-12-05T14:24:00.001-06:00

oh man, I DON'T KNOW! so, okay, tonight (Dec. 5th), saint nick comes to put a couple little treats (usually candy, a little toy, and an orange) in your stocking if you have been good. if not you get coal (for making a snowman! yay!), OR (so i've read) if you've been very bad, a spanking, and if you've been REALLY bad, he will take you away in a sack. sleep tight, kids!
anyhoo, we've always celebrated st nick's growing up (apparently a regional thing, who knew?) but i don't know: are saint nick and santa claus the same? or are they pals? brothers? acquaintances? rivals? saint nicholas rides a white horse, santa has a sleigh with reindeer. cripes. i think i'm going with brothers (which i have just totally made up). is it too early for egg nog?
help me out, people!!

ebay christmas

2007-12-04T15:45:00.001-06:00

that little brother is costing me more than he's worth these days. (or so it would seem.)

lullaby of the inept mother

2007-12-01T14:43:00.001-06:00

i am on baby #3 and my repertoire consists of a few commercial jingles and the "banana splits" theme. sometimes i actually make them start crying when i sing.

another body-image rant

2007-11-30T09:42:00.000-06:00

OK, I am NOT making this up. There is a new body design for our old pal Barbie® called the "Model Muse®" body (see it here) that is literally grotesquely skeletal. Um, WHAT? A Barbie® with actual thighs was too much? Did they look at this and say "THAT'S what we need to sell to young girls!" ??
(And as my sister-in-law observed, "Ken would be sad.")
I am going to eat a donut now. For Barbie®.
ALSO: I just noticed the Illustration Friday topic for today is excess, which fits for this too! OMG! And I just did a blog search for "model muse Barbie" and came up with this and this. All right, girls!!

my apologies to dr seuss, and also my husband

2007-11-29T14:25:00.001-06:00

he actually got through the whole book, which is better than i would have done.

the monkey house

2007-11-25T10:56:00.001-06:00

for illustration friday, "zoo"

tina pitches her show

2007-11-21T12:01:00.001-06:00

also i drew this while holding a large infant.
p.s. jill talley would be perfect!

my children's book

2007-11-09T09:29:00.000-06:00

my husband suggested i write a children's book based on my "tina" character.

rain cloud

2007-11-09T09:21:00.001-06:00

rejection letter season always seems to follow self-promotion season. lots of completely valid constructive criticism ("keep going!"). but everything comes out cute. i'll never be a lisbeth zwerger. or vince waller (dang). the best i have to hope for is emulating someone who mashed their hands in a waffle iron.

beat poetry for moms

2007-11-05T09:02:00.001-06:00

also submitting to illustration friday- hey, there are hats...

HEY EVERYBODY

2007-11-02T12:13:00.001-05:00

ugh, i HATE having to look for work. why can't people just magically find me? i'm actually embarrassed that my "serious" portfolio url is my actual name.com, it seems so egomaniacal. sigh.

the horror!

2007-11-02T09:14:00.001-05:00

it's getting to be that time...

2007-10-30T08:51:00.000-05:00

it is starting to get cold at night...the date the heat is officially turned on for the season in your house is a matter of pride here (okay, so, there isn't much else going on). at the grocery store, you can hear strangers comparing notes: "it was so cold last night i almost turned the heat on!" (it was 38!)

he only likes me for my glasses

2007-10-27T22:57:00.001-05:00

okay, i'm exaggerating. with my glasses off, the baby is just a fleshy blob. actually, he's pretty much just a fleshy blob anyway. never mind.

a multi-panel extravaganza!

2007-10-25T13:55:00.001-05:00

epic! it was too much to fit on one post-it...click to enlarge.

things that happen in my house, part 400

2007-10-23T15:16:00.001-05:00

this one is for my pal kim, who enjoys my misery and liked this story. also, thanks for the mention on the etsy forums, between that & the poor souls who stumble across my blog after googling "breast implants" (see previous posts for my series on homemade breast implants) i hope to brighten someone's day, somewhere.

if you're out there, Carrie Fisher, thanks a LOT

2007-10-23T14:43:00.001-05:00

(don't tell the baby this actually happened)

hey, mom

2007-10-18T15:40:00.001-05:00

i was actually yelling "THERE IS NO SHOUTING IN THIS HOUSE" which is what i say every ten minutes.
sorry, this is a pretty bad drawing, but i drew it while holding a writhing infant, so, you know.

it's love your body day!

2007-10-18T14:57:00.000-05:00

hello, sailor! okay, so i was reading jezebel.com this morning, and came across this post:
http://jezebel.com/gossip/body-issues/love-your-body-even-if-its-shaped-like-a-brick-312404.php
it's about the "new" 12 female body shapes (from the uk, so they have cute names like "skittle") and, you know, what to wear to hide your shame. (news flash: i'm STILL a "pear," albeit with dainty ankles.) so i figured since most of my gags revolve around my, um, figure, it was only fitting i honor this i'm-totally-not-making-this-up day.
also, i have to stop showing this blog to my poor, horrified husband, because after he saw this drawing he just covered his face with his hands and said "oh my god" very quietly.

let's find a job-2007 edition

2007-10-15T09:45:00.001-05:00

looking for work again...and suddenly i feel about 6000 years old. does being funny, or like, able to draw count for anything? also, i miss doing stop-motion animation.

baby weight

2007-10-13T11:04:00.001-05:00

fat wonderwoman revisited

2007-10-13T10:42:00.001-05:00

Yay! The very funny Fat Wonderwoman Blog posted another one of my terrible post-its. (Actually, I did this in Corel Painter, so it's a fauxt-it?)
Below is this first one I did for them. I heart McGriddles.

mom face

2007-10-01T16:08:00.001-05:00

i've realized that, really, the only time i'm not clenching my teeth is when i'm yelling. because even if one of the kids is actually being good, that means another one is not...
p.s. if you tilt your head, the drawing on the right is also what i look like when i'm sleeping.

advice for breastfeeding mothers

2007-09-29T16:33:00.000-05:00

armchair parenting

2007-09-29T16:09:00.001-05:00

(the dialogue is meant to be read like an auctioneer)
so, my back is still bothering me and this is what my day looks like.

grocery shopping

2007-09-26T11:09:00.001-05:00

my sincere apologies to Frida Kahlo

2007-09-24T08:56:00.000-05:00

okay, so, my back has gone out for the third time in two weeks.

i need a drink

2007-09-10T08:55:00.001-05:00

okay, so i hate drawing cars

2007-09-10T08:53:00.001-05:00

(censored language)
my boss tries to teach me how to draw cars
fin.

please send me a job

2007-08-23T21:24:00.001-05:00

what?

2007-08-23T21:20:00.002-05:00

my boss is mean (a recurring theme)

2007-08-23T21:20:00.001-05:00

squelch those happy thoughts

2007-08-23T21:19:00.001-05:00

pregnancy (a series)

2007-08-23T21:17:00.001-05:00

My baby is just as good as your baby...

the anti-hug force field

2007-08-23T21:16:00.001-05:00

I used to have personal space issues...

the ultrasound

2007-08-23T21:15:00.001-05:00

and where did I set my coffee?

2007-08-23T21:13:00.001-05:00

new baby (a series)

2007-08-23T21:12:00.001-05:00

the owner's manual

2007-08-23T21:11:00.001-05:00

it's hereditary

2007-08-23T20:50:00.000-05:00

Tina vs Elvgren (my apologies)

2007-08-23T20:41:00.001-05:00

the best gift ever

2007-08-22T16:55:00.001-05:00

okay, so my husband just gave me the coolest thing in the universe, it is a toothbrush that plays "rock n roll all night" (the best song ever!) by KISS (i am not making this up, look)
AND the sound comes out of the brush head itself, so the music literally plays inside your head. anyway, it's supposed to get you to brush for 2 full minutes, but the irony is, as a haggard parent, i don't get 2 minutes to myself for anything. fortunately, i can't hear anything else while using it...
ps. i awkwardly drew this on the computer tablet while holding the baby. see above comment.

safe swearing

2007-08-05T16:23:00.000-05:00

must...maintain...composure in front of...children... (i actually did this one sort-of recently, compared to the others from a few years ago...these aren't posted in order)

ice cream is the new alcohol

2007-08-04T10:06:00.000-05:00

because sugar overload is okay while pregnant...

my boss is mean (a series)

2007-08-04T10:01:00.001-05:00

my boss is mean #2

2007-08-04T09:58:00.002-05:00

my boss is mean #3

2007-08-04T09:58:00.001-05:00

my boss is mean #4

2007-08-04T09:46:00.000-05:00

tina's homemade breast implants (a series)

2007-08-04T09:45:00.001-05:00

homemade breast implants #2

2007-08-04T09:44:00.002-05:00